The biggest bodywork mistake I’m glad I made.

Over 20 years ago, I graduated from massage school. I was an energetic, anatomy and physiology obsessed soft tissue manipulator. For 10 years, I built a thriving practice by releasing muscle tension with aggressive, deep tissue therapy. These treatments made for a lot of happy customers, pleased with the relief they gained from this deep sensory pressure. However, after years of this work, I was not happy with having to address the same issue over and over again with little to no lasting results. At the same time, I also began to notice how tension patterns extended beyond the soft tissue, into layers that I didn’t quite have the words to describe...yet. So off I went looking for a better solution in other modalities.

Fast forward through dozens of mind-body treatments and years of trainings including Reiki, acupuncture, Integrative Talk Therapy, and more until I found my answer in Craniosacral Therapy. It is:

• evidence-based,

• rooted in science (embryology),

• treats the subtle layers we don’t always have the words to describe AND

• brings forward a self-awareness that transforms how you show up in everyday life.

So, I wouldn’t necessarily call my repeatedly bullying a muscle into submission a mistake, but it definitely was only one step towards understanding and effectively releasing the body’s tension patterns. The lack of progress and lasting results I saw from deep tissue work propelled me into a holistic modality where clients leave my table and online group sessions feeling not only relief, but also transformed. I’ll tell you about the very first time that happened in next week’s email.

If you’re ready to improve your massages by peeling back the more subtle layers of your tension, you are ready to add Craniosacral Therapy to your self-care repertoire.

AND if you’re ready to feel better while also learning how to do this for yourself in everyday life, saving lots of money on treatments, you’re ready to join the online group sessions.

Here to help you feel aligned and in-flow even when you’re affected by circumstances beyond your control.

Aimee

✔ How to shift your self-care "shoulding" into doing.

Last week, I told you about the one thing that shifts us from talking about self-care versus doing self-care. (Click here to read the post.)

As promised, I'm here to give you two ways to shift out of self-care "shoulding" and into feeling good about self-care doing with two different ways to be self-care aware.

1) Shift your perspective. Give yourself grace and say, “I’m doing enough right now”. Because, if you are eating, sleeping, working and socializing (smiling at the grocery store clerk counts as socializing for introverts), you ARE doing some very important daily self-care. So, go into awareness and stay there, breathing patiently, until you can find the ways in which you ARE taking care of yourself. Then genuinely give yourself credit for those self-care wins. Sometimes it takes a while to feel genuine about the celebration so be patient with the process.

However, if your current coping mechanisms aren’t effectively managing your stress, you don’t feel like how you’re caring for yourself is enough and your level of discomfort is high but you’re still stuck, try this:

2) Hold space to connect with the discomfort. Stop thinking about it and start feeling it. Be present with the depth of the discomfort and maybe even journal a written list of how the unmanaged stress is impacting your life. What are you teaching your kids about self-care? Are you showing up at work and in your family in the way you want? What would it be like to feel healthy from self-care? When was the last time you felt good about how you processed stress? I’m not asking you to wallow in self-pity, dramatics or beat yourself up. I’m asking you to be brave, compassionate and honest with yourself so all of the discomfort your feeling can also be seen.

Here’s the best part… When you do this exercise well, you will not only connect with the motivation to start self-care but the second issue of “where to start” will also likely become obvious.

If you’re having trouble figuring how to do either of these, schedule a 1-on-1 session with me. I’ll guide you through it and we’ll get there together.

Until next time, stay well.
Aimee

Do you want to spring 🐇 into self-care buuuuutttt . . .

But, well … ya’ know, it’s just not happening? You're not alone.

I can group 20 years of clients into 2 self-care camps, those who want to do self-care and those who are showing up and doing it.

There’s no judgment for which category you fall into right now. I too find myself bouncing between both sides of the coin. But in case you didn’t know why you're in the camp you're in, here’s the thing that changes your wanting to doing: your level of discomfort.

When life is really intense and you’re maxed out, you will likely do self-care: get the treatment, go work out or do the meditation. Last year when remote learning went from an annoying mess to a disastrous, full fledged $#!* show, I hit a breaking point and as a result, got really good about my 5-minute morning Qigong practice. AND the Qigong made a noticeable difference in how I was able to self-regulate and cope throughout the day, I kept at it. (I’ll talk more about this important piece later in the month.)

But when the stress is less severe or it is just an ongoing nuisance, you’ll likely manage stress with coping mechanisms such as procrastination, "I don't have time for self-care", intellectualizing by talking about or analyzing it or even organizing your stressors on 800 post-its or to do lists. Let’s be honest, sometimes coping might even be a cocktail or an edible. Sound familiar?

Next week, I’ll send you two different ways you can move forward from managing your stress and all that self-care "shoulding" into feeling good about the self-care you've done.

Talk again soon,

Aimee

PS - In the meantime, I invite you to consider how much of your energy you're using to "manage your stress" with coping mechanisms versus processing and dissipating it.

The One Thing I Can't Live Without

Years ago while soaking up the sun beach-side, a women came up to my 1 year old looking for a cute baby giggle and smile. Unfortunately, she was greeted with my daughter’s classic “leave me alone” side-eye. As I apologized for the post-nap baby grumpies, she said, “Oh, no problem. I’m a NICU nurse, I get it all the time. She’s just hatching. I don’t blame her.”

Since that moment, we gained the perfect name for those slow wake-up moments. My household has nothing but respect for “hatching”.  Even though I’m a morning person, I certainly don’t pop out of bed ready for the day. I need to hatch and I have THE BEST hatching routine that I couldn’t live without. 

Courtesy of my Qigong teacher and friend, Emmett, I have an amazing and quick routine that gets my mind and body going in the morning. My favorite aspect of this hatching routine is the manifesting. It effortlessly integrates my intentions into my current mindset, making it easier to keep on track all day. My body feels better too!

So, yes, I’m absolutely going to share this great little session thanks to Emmett and my NEW Regain Your Rhythm app. The app will be free until April so jump in now and check it out. Over the next month and a half, you’ll get:

• access to Emmett’s awesome hatching routine,

• a 5 minute calm clarity reset so you can triage your tension during the day,

• the 7 day settling challenge to, amongst other things, improve your sleep quality,

• direct access to yours truly for real self-care support when you feel stuck,

• and more!

Are you ready for self-care to get a whole lot easier?

First, register here and click “Try Free” in the Regain Your Rhythm box. Then you’ll get an email to download the easy access app for iOS or Android. With this app, notifications won’t get lost in your email and you’ll enjoy inspired daily connections, where you don’t accidentally get lost in a sea of social media for longer than you planned.

You’ll find Emmett’s video with this article in the featured section.

I look forward to seeing you in our mighty network so you can regain your rhythm.

Aimee

How to feel better on every level

Last week, we talked about how your stress wants to get out of your body but that isn't always easy. Despite your best efforts, sometimes it can feel like there's a tension "residue" that you can't quite put your finger on and don't know how to fix. Enter Craniosacral Therapy because that is it's specialty! Craniosacral Therapy treats the elusive, unseen layers. Take this moment to connect inward, as you find out how some Observatory students describe this hard-to-describe process:

"I feel like the scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz - I keep losing my straw from daily physical and emotional struggles. But Craniosacral self-care enables me to replenish what is lost and to retain more and more each time. I feel less stressed everyday just knowing I this self-care will always come to my rescue." - Sue Y.

"When I had an in person CST treatment with Aimee to help with TMJ issues, I came out with less jaw pain and feeling 20 pounds lighter on an emotional level. She explained the TMJ will always be there or come back if I don't deal with how my body is holding the tension patterns. So I signed up for The Observatory - my first time ever trying meditation. That is when I started to feel like me again! Healing the TMJ became a gateway into layers of relief I didn’t know I needed. I’ve become a different person – a much better version of myself. The shift in my mindset has been life changing for not only me but my family too. They noticed the change in me within a couple months. I am happier, kinder, fun again and it was all due to the self-healing classes and the work I was putting in between classes." - Jo R.

"Your comments in class are often so timely and validating! While I don't always keep up with every aspect of the awareness exercises, just having you acknowledge one thing I’ve been feeling always makes a huge difference in my stress. It helps me to “unlock” where I’m stuck. Thank you for holding the space for me to process." - Deb T.

"Practicing Craniosacral self-healing has helped me be a calmer person. When I start to feel pain/stress in my neck/back I’m more aware that it’s time to mediate - or at least take some time for myself. It’s easier to not get as frustrated over things and am much better at forgiving myself for not “getting everything done” on a daily basis. A big part of that is taking the time in these classes to see the whole picture, learning to make a more reasonable To Do lists and to prioritize things to help achieve long term goals." - Eileen S.

If this sounds like something that could transform your everyday stress too, then you need to sign up for the free 7 Day Beginner's Challenge happening in March - in the new app!

For good health and happiness,

Aimee

What your stress and tension really wants for Valentine’s Day

To understand what your stress and tension really wants, we must first be honest about what your stress and tension really is.

Stress is your reaction to life - unreacted. Stress is your reply to what happens around you but is stuck within. Your physical tension, mental chatter and emotional irritability are the compartmentalized responses to the day that have not been allowed out. That said, I probably don’t need to tell you what they really want for Valentine’s Day…to get out - completely!

Now, sometimes you can discharge stress with a good workout, venting to a friend or detaching with screen time. However, while these can help you cope with the superficial intensity, it doesn’t always heal the more subtle charges in your mind-body (nervous) system. And as a sensitive, intuitive, mindful person, you know this superficial relief isn’t usually enough. You know you need to be able to fully let go – physically, mentally, emotionally, consciously and unconsciously. More importantly, your stress and tension wants that too! It wants to be released from all your layers for a relief you can feel on every level.

Curious, what that feels like? Next week, you’ll hear about it from a few folks.

For your health and happiness,

Aimee

PS – I am so very excited to be launching an app where you can easily access all this Craniosacral self-healing goodness and the like-minded community in one easy (non-social media) spot. Stay tuned for the exact timing as well as the free 7 Day Beginners Challenge happening, in the app, in March.

How to make the most of the shortest month

While playing Uno with the kids after dinner one night, I was complaining about the algae growth in my fish tank to my very proficient saltwater tank friend and guest for the night, Britta. “Oh, snails are great for that!” she said. “They’ll keep it clean for you.” So a few days later my daughter, Kat, and I brought home Jet, the snail.

It’s been fun to play “I spy” every day to see where Jet has moved to, especially since he looks just like most of the rocks in the tank. But, is it wrong to be frustrated at how slowly my new snail is cleaning the tank? I mean, it’s a snail not a Mr. Clean commercial. What did I expect would happen?

As I sit in my meditation spot that overlooks the fish tank, I’m laughing at the irony of my snail expectations. I’m also laughing because my algae fix is the same as my recommendation to you for getting the most out of the shortest month: get more snails.

February is the month of hibernation or as we call it in the Observatory, Nourish To Flourish. This is the time of year to hunker down and embrace restorative dormancy. (And no, I’m not saying you should stop doing cardio for 4 weeks.) I am saying you should seize the season of recuperation by finding a lot of slow and steady algae eaters. By that I mean, find a lot of small and steady self-healing moments. This will help to clear the clutter of stimuli littering your nervous system so you can get the most out of this short month.

Right now, I want you to set an alarm on your phone or in your scheduler do an awareness exercise once a week. Go ahead, set the alarms. I’ll wait…

OK - In that 20, 60 or 120 second moment, simply stop what you’re doing and bring your awareness to a part of your body and breathe. With your eyes closed or open, I want you to really visualize and observe that part of you with curiosity.

If you are the go big or go home type, you can always add another 20 second breathing appointment to your scheduler. But please, ONLY AFTER you’ve done the first. You can even assign the body part in advance so you don’t have to think too much about it when the alarm goes off. Here are some ideas to get you started:

• You could pick from the 5 primary organs according to Chinese Medicine: Heart, Kidneys, Liver, Lungs and Spleen.

• If you’re a weightlifter you could pick the muscle groups that you focused on the last time you worked out.

• If you have a sedentary desk job, you could visualize the ways in which the body has movement and flow: blood pumped by the heart, cerebrospinal fluid nourishing the brain and spinal cord or the electrical currents that flow from sensory systems to the brain and spinal cord and then back out to the connective tissue with the messaging of how to react.

While the real anatomical accuracy doesn’t matter, it can be helpful to google a simple diagram to get your awareness awareness juices flowing. But ultimately, just be curious and observe your imagination. Next week, we’ll discuss how awareness of our actual body ignites unconscious healing processes.

Here to help you activate the healing within,

Aimee

PS – If you check out Britta’s amazing 375 gallons of saltwater tanks, they’re on display at GMS Heating and Cooling in Morton Grove. You can pop in, they don’t mind. She just got a seahorse!

Not keeping up with self-care? Here’s one to get you back on the horse.

Can I be frank with you? Most meditations bore me. They are often vague or open ended and typically don’t have anything to do with what is ailing me. When my brain doesn’t see something as relevant, I have a REALLY hard time getting myself to do it, much less do it well.

Then I found Craniosacral Therapy (CST) awareness exercises and that all changed. They're practical. They're relevant. They are rooted in the science of embryology. This science harnesses the same DNA genius that created you from a few cells in the beginning so you can:

1. restore your original health,

2. regain your nervous system’s rhythm and

3. reveal healing insights that change how you show up in life.

CST awareness exercises allow you to hear helpful data from your nervous system. It reveals truths about yourself that only you can access. It reinstates and nourishes your connection with self, even when you’re not sure who that is.

That’s what can happen when you use a framework that connects with your actual mind-body system versus repeating words or floating out in space. And yes, I realize I just knocked my meditation from last week….but I’m really not. These meditations are fantastic. BUT they become life changing and unleash innate healing when used in a larger strategy that corresponds with real anatomy and biology.

So are you ready to spice things up? Are you ready to release physical tension while also discovering insights about yourself for an unflappable confident clarity?

GREAT! Click here for my Craniosacral Rhythm reset to try for free this week. This is a bite size introduction to one of the three nervous system rhythms. Give it a try now and then a few more times later this week.

 In health and happiness,

Aimee

PS – Quick Tip: You’re not looking to master your Craniosacral rhythm after one week. It takes a long time to master your rhythms BUT that doesn’t mean you won’t see results. Simply be a curious observer and allow your body to self-regulate for calm, clarity and aligned flow.

My word of the year is REGULATION.

I sat in my car with a blank gaze. I must have looked like a nut, sitting there motionless with messy hair and wrinkle lines across most of my face. But you know what I’m talking about – the post massage buzz.

I just had a wonderful 90 minute treatment that squeezed away the back pain, the results of breaking up the sidewalk ice last week. Because I was having trouble forming a thought, I knew I wasn’t present enough to drive the car. So I grabbed for my planner (yes, I still use a written one) to pull myself back to earth. As I read through my very aspirational to-do list for the week, I could feel my chest get heavy and panic resettle into my jaw. I’m happy to say that my back remained loose but as I chased away the mental fog of the treatment, I also chased away the false inner peace of my massage.

You see, massage is wonderful at squeezing tight muscles into submission, which can allow you the space to catch your breath. However, your mental and emotional discomfort hasn’t changed. How you feel about life circumstances remains the same. How you view, or can’t see, your next best step hasn’t changed.

This is why my word of the year is regulation. Relaxation is nice but regulation opens the door for lasting change. While the two concepts are indeed related, they are not the same. Basically, regulation is being able to relax your mind-body (nervous) system while functioning, carrying on in life. There is co-regulation and self-regulation. Co-regulation is why people love practicing meditation in groups. It is also what your children need from you in order to learn and master their own self-regulation. And of course, self-regulation is where you need to be in order to offer co-regulation to friends, family, co-workers and everyone around you.

Here’s the thing…

You must first master relaxation to be equipped for any kind of regulation. Most meditations out there can help you build your relaxation skills, just like a good massage. In our Craniosacral self-care program, we call this level of meditation - settling. At the beginning of every class we settle before moving into revealing, healing and regulating. More on those other three another time, but if you are ready to give the first step a try - click here for this month’s free mini-reset. This three-minute guided awareness exercise features our Space Decompression Settling.

For and with you in healthy and happiness,

Aimee

PS – Next week you’ll have limited time access to one of my regulating resets. So be sure to practice this settling reset a few times this week. It will prime your nervous system to get the most out of the next one.

The worst New Year's intention you can have when it comes to self-care.

In the quiet, cold Chicago air, all I heard were the synchronized rhythms of shovels stabbing at ice. My neighbor and I looked up and laughed because we realized we were making our own musical hybrid of Stomp and Frozen. When we finally made our way to where the property lines met, we got to talking about the new year.

While we both don't do resolutions, we discussed how we do enjoy the refreshing new outlook of the new year. But then she made the terrible statement I hear from people all the time about self-care, "I'm definitely going to meditate more. I know it would be good for me."

Obviously, this intention breaks all the rules of a SMART goal (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, time-bound). A SMART version of this could be, "I'm going to meditate for at least 5 minutes every week to relax my body and get out of my head."

But even this SMART goal is missing key components that could prevent failure or another year of falling off track. This intention is missing the support system that will help you succeed. Here is how I would rewrite that New Year's self-care intention:

I'm going to learn a self-awareness framework that I can use to self-regulate in everyday life as well as to guide me through the life changes I'm experiencing. I'm going to sign up for an ongoing program that supports ongoing success. A program with real time support so I can easily overcome getting stuck, feel accountability without guilt, as well as evidence-based content that keeps my practice interesting and practical.

But even if meditation isn't your goal, I invite you to first consider identifying the right support system. It is really hard to consistently maintain a self-care practice by yourself when you're already exhausted.

In health and happiness,

Aimee

PS - Did you notice I used the term regulated instead of relaxed? There is a very important distinction here and I'll talk more about that next week.