The worst New Year's intention you can have when it comes to self-care.

In the quiet, cold Chicago air, all I heard were the synchronized rhythms of shovels stabbing at ice. My neighbor and I looked up and laughed because we realized we were making our own musical hybrid of Stomp and Frozen. When we finally made our way to where the property lines met, we got to talking about the new year.

While we both don't do resolutions, we discussed how we do enjoy the refreshing new outlook of the new year. But then she made the terrible statement I hear from people all the time about self-care, "I'm definitely going to meditate more. I know it would be good for me."

Obviously, this intention breaks all the rules of a SMART goal (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, time-bound). A SMART version of this could be, "I'm going to meditate for at least 5 minutes every week to relax my body and get out of my head."

But even this SMART goal is missing key components that could prevent failure or another year of falling off track. This intention is missing the support system that will help you succeed. Here is how I would rewrite that New Year's self-care intention:

I'm going to learn a self-awareness framework that I can use to self-regulate in everyday life as well as to guide me through the life changes I'm experiencing. I'm going to sign up for an ongoing program that supports ongoing success. A program with real time support so I can easily overcome getting stuck, feel accountability without guilt, as well as evidence-based content that keeps my practice interesting and practical.

But even if meditation isn't your goal, I invite you to first consider identifying the right support system. It is really hard to consistently maintain a self-care practice by yourself when you're already exhausted.

In health and happiness,

Aimee

PS - Did you notice I used the term regulated instead of relaxed? There is a very important distinction here and I'll talk more about that next week.